Recently some old friends from primary school talked about having a gathering to commemorate the 25th year since we left the school. My wall in facebook is filled with lots of comments and jokes and some are very hilarious. There are also some friends whom I have not seen again for a very long time since the last day I stepped out of the school gate. Since most of my friends were born and raised in KL and are currently working in the big city, the way they were brought up resembles the way they think, speak and decide. Not to mention – joke. Although most jokes I find funny and witty, there are some of them which I think is rather “made the old wound bleeds”.
You see, when I was a kid I kind of screw up my life. I did something awfully bad until the whole school witnessed the discipline teacher smacked me with three stokes of rattan. It was a big hoo-haa then when even a magistrate attorney sent the school a note to tell the principal not to cane students in public to avoid other younger students from being ‘traumatized’.
That was then. Time flies very fast and now I have changed. Just as much as I do not want to remember those dark days in school, the memories keep haunting me now and then. It is not a big deal though. However some people have this habit of stigmatism towards others and I’m not comfortable at all with it. What happened was, this friend of mind opened up a subject and discussed about what I had done during that time, the chronology and everything. Although some of the facts were wrongly expressed, I still feel uncomfortable with her comments and statements.
Now I am uncertain whether or not I should attend the gathering. What is the point of going if all I hear is people talking about what I had done a long time ago? So I thought perhaps I should leave my primary school’s group in facebook – which I did – to make me feel better. Come to think of it, I have not been contacting my old friends ever since I left for Aotearoa. I survived, so I guess I could still survive even without having them around. Vice versa, I don’t think they would even notice my disappearance.
I’m very much comfortable with my life now. I’m away from the bustling city most of the time; I have a wonderful family, a nice cozy house, an orchard, a car to travel in, and my PC games. I couldn’t ask for more.
Some memories are just not meant to be remembered.
